Although devotional service is transcendental, most devotees are not fully on the transcendental stage and therefore require to practice varņāśrama-dharma. Even great acäryas, who for their own sake do not need to follow the worldly rules of varņāśrama-dharma, nevertheless act on the platform of varņāśrama-dharma to educate others. For example, that is why Śrila Bhaktisiddhänta Sarasvati superficially stepped down to the level of sannyāsa (a stage of varņāśrama-dharma). Previously he had been leading a visibly renounced life akin to that of Gaurakiśora Dāsa Bābāji, yet after he adopted sannyäsa he availed of big buildings, automobiles, and stylish clothing, just to teach others how to become Krsna conscious while living in this world.
However, very few devotees are anywhere near the plane of the great ācāryas. Most of us, if we are honest, will have to admit that we struggle with base material desires. And even if a devotee considers himself to be fully realized, others might discern that he is delusional. It is easy to proclaim and advertise, but it is not so common to actually be a pure, spotless devotee, free from all material attraction. Philosophically, we all accept that we are not man or woman, black or white, Indian or Chinese – that as spiritual beings we are all intrinsically equal – yet we should realistically admit that almost all devotees are actually not on the topmost spiritual platform, and that therefore need to conduct our lives accordingly.
Although in one sense all devotees are on the transcendental platform, most seem to not be very firmly situated thereon, as suggested by the not infrequent sexual falldowns within ISKCON. Such falldowns are likely to remain common unless the movement adopts significantly stricter adherence to the varnäsrama-dharma principle of restricting interaction between the sexes. Śrila Prabhupāda was once asked, “We have the perfect philosophy, the perfect way of life, and the perfect guru [Šrila Prabhupāda], so why do we have so many problems in our society?” And Śrila Prabhupāda replied, “Because the brahmacārīs and sannyasis mix too much with the women.” [1]
Šrīmad-Bhägavatam (7.12.9) states:
Woman is compared to fire, and man is compared to a butter pot. Therefore, a man should avoid associating even with his own daughter in a secluded place. Similarly, he should also avoid association with other women. One should associate with women only for important business and not otherwise.
In his purport to this verse, Srila Prabhupäda explains:
If a butter pot and fire are kept together, the butter within the pot will certainly melt. Woman is compared to fire, and man is compared to a butter pot. However advanced one may be in restraining the senses, it is almost impossible for a man to keep himself controlled in the presence of a woman, even if she is his own daughter, mother, or sister. Indeed, his mind is agitated even if one is in the renounced order of life. Therefore, Vedic civilization carefully restricts mingling between men and women. If one cannot understand the basic principle of restraining association between man and woman, he is to be considered an animal. That is the purport of this verse.
Śrila Prabhupāda further averred:
Unnecessary association with women, even with one’s mother, sister or daughter, is strictly prohibited. This is human civilization. A civilization that allows men to mix unrestricted with women is an animal civilization. In Kali-yuga, people are extremely liberal, but mixing with women and talking with them as equals actually constitutes an uncivilized way of life.[2]
[1] Told by Giriraja Swami. [2] SB 7.12.8 ppt.
Source: Book: Mothers & Masters, Page: 19-21